anyone ever lost the plot?

[matticooper]

Almost 10 weeks ago I was made redundant from my workplace of almost 13 years. In my opinion it was handled pretty badly by my workplace (I was treated like a criminal). I wasn't allowed access back to my computer again once I was given the news. Passwords were all changed/access to files changed and basically told to grab my things off my desk and go home, with a fistful of documents to sign so I couldn't go back to them at a later stage (even typing this up almost 10 weeks later is stirring up the feels).

After going to solicitors (and finding out they'd stuffed up my redundancy payout), and then having to go back in to hand in the documentation, attempting to get some of my files off my computer and files/macros from the server that I'd created (which were now no longer mine) and basically having the IT Admin sitting at my shoulder going, no, you can't have that file, it will have company information in there... or that one... or my personal back up of emails (because one of them might contain work information), it really sunk in how much I was not wanted/how much of a threat I was, even though they greeted you with a smile and asked me how I was going.

So after those 2 big kick in the guts, and some days where I really felt down in the dumps (and strangely, other days where I felt great because I was out of the workplace that made me feel unhappy at times) and wondering what the hell I was going to do, I let some of my close friends know my situation. And out of the blue, 5 of them came back with job offers, or offers to keep their eyes open to help out a mate. In hindsight, I wished I'd cast the net a bit further, who knows what might have happened.

I basically became Mr. Mum, looking after the kids, looking for jobs up here on the Central Coast (which is fairly non-existent), keeping myself busy with. And let me tell you, kids have a way of bringing you back down to Earth real quickly (even if my 7 year old constantly asked me if I'd lost me job on the 1st day home). Now, almost 10 weeks later, I have my last day at home as an unemployed bum and will return back to the workforce after 10 weeks. And now come more feels... will I be able to cope....

TLDR: Made redundant almost 10 weeks ago, became Mr. Mum, now on my last day at home before new job...

[Vilante]

That's a massive life change Matti, after 13 years. I have been working at the same place for the same amount of time.

I've witnessed similar situations and it's such an awful thing when not handled well. I know two people who lost their Fathers due to similar situations. I don't think employers realise how massive this sort of thing is for a person. There is way too much focus on what is good for the business these days and not enough on the people.

Really glad you've pulled through ok and are about the get back into Matt. All the best mate.

[Bauer]

Hope it goes well Matt. You are a good lad


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Dr. Pain]

Redundancy sucks. I've been there. It's good though it didn't take you long to find something else. Time at home can be really good especially with kids around. Returning to work can seem daunting after a time away.

[Montey]

Redundancy sucks no matter when it happens or under what circumstances.

Please keep in mind that there is a chance that your former employer may have handled it the best they could. The way workplace laws work these days, combined with the fact you had access to IT administrative credentials does mean you are a very big, potential, threat to them. Current workplace laws mean that most of the power, most of the time, is very much in the hands of the employee. It is -very- hard to dismiss a full time, or part time, permanent employee unless they have either been grossly negligent/disruptive or unless the company is in financial trouble. In the case of the latter tho, the only path is through redundancy which means they can not re-hire in to that role for the foreseeable future (if they do you could have them for unfair dismissal). Did you know that if you say something that hurts the feelings of another company's employee your employer can be charged with breaching workplace anti-bullying laws.

Being part of their IT team makes you, potentially, a very significant threat to their organisation. If I was their IT security consultant and they asked my advice about dismissing an IT administrator I would have told them to do it pretty much as they did. I know that sucks for the impacted employee(s), i.e. you, but from the company's perspective you had access to admin credentials of their information systems. If you went rogue on them, whilst they let you keep unsupervised access, you could have deleted, copied or modified materials; you could have left time-bombs behind to do damage after you were gone; you could have created remote-access back-doors in to the IT environment for latter use. I have seen all of these things, and worse, done by IT admin's after their employer had to let them go.

So please don't let how they did things upset you. It is just part of being an IT administrator. IT systems place a lot of reliance on the ethical behaviour of their admin's and unfortunately too many stop being ethical after being terminated which taints everyone else.

The first piece of advice I give anyone getting in to, or recently in, IT is always build a reserve of cash (or easily sold assets) for the day you get retrenched; it will happen as sure as the sun comes up in the morning. In the past 16 years I have been retrenched from IT companies 4 times. I aim to have around $50K of accessible reserves to ensure that I have time to find a good new job whilst not altering my families lifestyle. IT companies are notoriously badly run (most IT company owners know almost nothing about IT and/or have not had much business management experience) and are very reactive to market pressures (i.e. when the economy tightens customers almost always stop spending on IT first).

[norbs]

Redundancy sucks no matter when it happens or under what circumstances.

Please keep in mind that there is a chance that your former employer may have handled it the best they could. The way workplace laws work these days, combined with the fact you had access to IT administrative credentials does mean you are a very big, potential, threat to them. Current workplace laws mean that most of the power, most of the time, is very much in the hands of the employee. It is -very- hard to dismiss a full time, or part time, permanent employee unless they have either been grossly negligent/disruptive or unless the company is in financial trouble. In the case of the latter tho, the only path is through redundancy which means they can not re-hire in to that role for the foreseeable future (if they do you could have them for unfair dismissal). Did you know that if you say something that hurts the feelings of another company's employee your employer can be charged with breaching workplace anti-bullying laws.

Being part of their IT team makes you, potentially, a very significant threat to their organisation. If I was their IT security consultant and they asked my advice about dismissing an IT administrator I would have told them to do it pretty much as they did. I know that sucks for the impacted employee(s), i.e. you, but from the company's perspective you had access to admin credentials of their information systems. If you went rogue on them, whilst they let you keep unsupervised access, you could have deleted, copied or modified materials; you could have left time-bombs behind to do damage after you were gone; you could have created remote-access back-doors in to the IT environment for latter use. I have seen all of these things, and worse, done by IT admin's after their employer had to let them go.

So please don't let how they did things upset you. It is just part of being an IT administrator. IT systems place a lot of reliance on the ethical behaviour of their admin's and unfortunately too many stop being ethical after being terminated which taints everyone else.

The first piece of advice I give anyone getting in to, or recently in, IT is always build a reserve of cash (or easily sold assets) for the day you get retrenched; it will happen as sure as the sun comes up in the morning. In the past 16 years I have been retrenched from IT companies 4 times. I aim to have around $50K of accessible reserves to ensure that I have time to find a good new job whilst not altering my families lifestyle. IT companies are notoriously badly run (most IT company owners know almost nothing about IT and/or have not had much business management experience) and are very reactive to market pressures (i.e. when the economy tightens customers almost always stop spending on IT first).

All good advice Montey, except the bit I underlined. That is over 1 years wages for me.

[Montey]

Redundancy sucks no matter when it happens or under what circumstances.

Please keep in mind that there is a chance that your former employer may have handled it the best they could. The way workplace laws work these days, combined with the fact you had access to IT administrative credentials does mean you are a very big, potential, threat to them. Current workplace laws mean that most of the power, most of the time, is very much in the hands of the employee. It is -very- hard to dismiss a full time, or part time, permanent employee unless they have either been grossly negligent/disruptive or unless the company is in financial trouble. In the case of the latter tho, the only path is through redundancy which means they can not re-hire in to that role for the foreseeable future (if they do you could have them for unfair dismissal). Did you know that if you say something that hurts the feelings of another company's employee your employer can be charged with breaching workplace anti-bullying laws.

Being part of their IT team makes you, potentially, a very significant threat to their organisation. If I was their IT security consultant and they asked my advice about dismissing an IT administrator I would have told them to do it pretty much as they did. I know that sucks for the impacted employee(s), i.e. you, but from the company's perspective you had access to admin credentials of their information systems. If you went rogue on them, whilst they let you keep unsupervised access, you could have deleted, copied or modified materials; you could have left time-bombs behind to do damage after you were gone; you could have created remote-access back-doors in to the IT environment for latter use. I have seen all of these things, and worse, done by IT admin's after their employer had to let them go.

So please don't let how they did things upset you. It is just part of being an IT administrator. IT systems place a lot of reliance on the ethical behaviour of their admin's and unfortunately too many stop being ethical after being terminated which taints everyone else.

The first piece of advice I give anyone getting in to, or recently in, IT is always build a reserve of cash (or easily sold assets) for the day you get retrenched; it will happen as sure as the sun comes up in the morning. In the past 16 years I have been retrenched from IT companies 4 times. I aim to have around $50K of accessible reserves to ensure that I have time to find a good new job whilst not altering my families lifestyle. IT companies are notoriously badly run (most IT company owners know almost nothing about IT and/or have not had much business management experience) and are very reactive to market pressures (i.e. when the economy tightens customers almost always stop spending on IT first).

All good advice Montey, except the bit I underlined. That is over 1 years wages for me.

Yep. It's not for me, but I am fortunate enough to be fairly senior in a sector of IT that is in high demand and has few candidates. With kids school fees and a mortgage to pay (my reserve is in my redraw), that's what I need.

The amount should be scaled to suit your lifestyle, but you should bank on being able to cover at least 3 months, preferably 6 months unemployed without changing your spending habits. That way, by reducing costs, you should be able to eek out at least 5 months, and preferably 9 months, without an alternate wage. By having this approach you reduce the need to get too desperate too quickly and having to take the first shit job that turns up.

[Crowella]

Just putting my latest update in because thought it'd be good to mention I'm not a complete nutcase now.

Looking pretty fantastic mentally for me. Still having occasional moments and I swapped medications a month ago to basically just be on Effexor and Seroquel, which the latter makes me tired in the mornings but I'm working on it. Combined with the counseling, it seems to have really, REALLY done wonders. I'm feeling like I'm in a good head space again and very positive about it all now, especially since the real panic episodes are now down to maybe once or twice a week from several times a day. I feel confident enough now to actually exercise for long periods of time, eat more foods and just confident in general. Also getting a far better result this semester at uni has really made me quite relaxed and happy. I was glad I was able to put that effort in with what I've been dealing with. Still a while to go to where I would like to be but it's so much better than it was a few months ago and it was really scary to think I was that bad.

[pixelboy]

That's awesome.. Great news.. It's a constant battle but glad you're getting on top of it.

[Shonky]

Awesome news Crow, keep at it mate.

[Exar Kun]

Fantastic news dude!

[Vilante]

[Scottie]

Brilliant stuff man! Great to hear!

[Crowella]

Thanks guys. I've received so much support from a whole lot of people over this time, from close friends to people here to people I have not seen in years. I was really happy with how many people went out of their way to help me and I am so thankful.

[J.D.]

This looks promising for anyone with depression:

http://www.theage.com.au/technology/sci ... 2us2l.html

[w00dsy]

did we lose some posts from this thread? I'm sure there was some updates around the middle of last year that seem to have vanished. Anyway i'm back on meds, for the most part i've been going ok but then occasionally i seem to spiral out of control, like i did this last week. I'm having a week off work just to get everything to settle a bit. I think it's mostly work related, some of the deadlines we get are unrealistic and i tend to let it fester. From friday to monday were some of the darkest days i've had, with some very bad thoughts going through my head, then within a day of getting back on the meds i leveled off and everything is back on track. I guess i just have to stay on them for that safety net. It's better than the other option.

[VTRacing]

Sorry to hear that you had a spiral, mate. I'm glad you could recognise that getting back on the meds is infinitely preferable to the other option. When you're having those dark days it's tough to see a way through.

For myself, I can see where you're coming from regarding work as I have the same issues with deadlines (and letting things fester). I'm still on the meds myself, and still chatting to a psychologist every few weeks. That came about after some pretty nasty mental moments about 7 months ago.

Enjoy your week.

[w00dsy]

i think it's the modern world we live in. The company i sub contract too is constantly sending me and a couple of other permanant guys to different jobs every couple of days to finish or fix up other peoples work, usually the cowboys they get in because they're desperate. The builders we work for seem to fuck us around and hold us up in the early stages of the job, and then right near the end they demand everything gets finished sooner than expected. Being a finishing trade they expect us to make up all the time the others lost early in the project. It's completely unreasonable, but they threaten us with fines if it's not done. So our company calls in these guys they'd never normally use just to get it done. Then when there's defects they send us back to fix them. One of our guys is spending this week redoing a bunch of work because they guys that did it fucked it up so badly. So many of us are sick of it and we keep getting promised that 'after this bad job we'll have a good job for you'. But it almost never happens. We are all losing money doing it because fixing guys work doesn't pay as well as doing our own work, so the work is worse, the money is less, and the stress goes through the roof. I've started looking around for work elsewhere, but most domestic work seems to be quiet. So it's either do the commercial rubbish and get treated like shit or do nothing.

[DexterPunk]

That sucks w00dsy. It's amazing how much of an effect work has on your life. It's where you spend most of your time and energy. It's simplistic to tell yourself that you need to let things go, and not stress... but in reality it is stressful. Ever thought about looking around for something else? I guess at the end of the day, it all depends on how supportive they are, but if the deadlines are constantly unrealistic, it probably needs a proper meeting. I doubt anyone want to see their employees struggling like this. Enjoy your time off. Feel better soon mate.

[Vilante]

That sucks Woodsy but good job getting back on the meds. There's nothing wrong with using these tools to get the balance back. I know people that have been on them for ages and will probably always be on them, it's a pain, but like you said, better that than the alternative.

The work thing sucks too, I am on the other side of it, the customer; I always wonder how all the finishing gets done so quickly when things seem so casual early on in the build.

[VTRacing]

I've started looking around for work elsewhere, but most domestic work seems to be quiet. So it's either do the commercial rubbish and get treated like shit or do nothing.

Come up to Queensland. I need some new flooring in my place.

[w00dsy]

Ever thought about looking around for something else?

i have, but i can't find anything that would pay as well as my job with the limited education i have. I'd probably have to do a course of some sort to get something reasonable and finding the time for that is hard. I applied to become a prison officer, which is what i'd really like to do because it's interesting and it doesn't require a lot of physical work like what i'm currently doing. But i pulled out because the money wasn't as good(but it was regular) in the first year or so until you get to Cert 3 level, and i just felt too selfish putting myself first and not my family, so i'm going to try and get a few more years out of my current job until the kids have their own jobs. The problem i have with my job is i've hated it since i started doing it 27 years ago and only stuck with it because the money was ok.

The other problem is now that i am older i hurt more from all the years of being bent over and on my knees crawling around. I have degenerative arthritis and almost no cartilage in my left knee. That blew up just before xmas and caused a couple of weeks off work until i could kneel on it again. Unfortunately it's now permanently knackered so i have to manage it as best i can. Maybe one day i'll get a knee replacement. At the end of every day my back, hips, knees and ankles hurt but i keep going back to do it because i need to make money for my family. And now it's also sending me nuts because it's hard to get up and go do a job that you know causes physical pain and mental stress. In the end it breaks your spirit, but you have no choice when you're self employed. It's really hard to see a way out that ends well.

[DexterPunk]

Sorry I didn't notice you'd posted about looking elsewhere before I sent mine.

Is it selfish to put yourself first, when ultimately it will help your family if you're more content and less stressed in your job? I reckon once you feel a bit better, start looking again. It really seems like it would help a lot of the issues. Even if it's a job to keep you going until you score what you really want. I just don't think it's worth being unhappy in your job.

Lisa is going through a really tough time at her job right now, right before we head overseas for 6 weeks. It really sucks, and honestly i feel like I'm living with her stress as well at the moment. It gets to a point where you need to get out for your own sanity and health.

[J.D.]

Could you move into sales w00dsy?

[c.j]

As someone who has been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and ptsd I feel I can offer some advice that might be of benefit here. I have been on just about every AD medication out there. I am even stepped away from the ADF for 4 years to sort my shit out. I was put on Seroquel, Zoloft, Pristiq, Lexapro and more recently advanza supplemented with valdoxin. It can take a while to find something that helps you without ill side effects. If you experience any side effects then you need to have constant consultation with your Specialist until you find something that allows you gather yourself up and regroup.

But the biggest thing if you are feeling like shit is step away from circumstance that trigger those thoughts and/or feelings and seek a great psychologist who can help you to understand what is happening and allow you come up with a plan to work through them. Hand in hand with treatment from a psychiatrist who can help you regroup through medication. In my own example I was compounding the issue by staying awake for up to 3 sometimes 4 days, no sleep at all because I was afraid of where my mind was going to take me when I did. By getting 12 hours of solid sleep (advanza) and not being able to dream anything at all (valdoxin), I was able to then tackle the other issues head on with my psychologist.

Stress kills more people than is advertised in this country. We are a nation of either lazy slobs who expect entitlement or flat out workers who don't understand when is the correct time to speak up and say "No, I have enough to do at the moment". I would expect that the majority of people here are the latter.

Adrenal fatigue is something that can sneak up on a person. You move in to survival mode when you panic at the thought of someone seeing your mental anguish as a weakness and you start to rely on other chemicals in your brain to get through each day. Until you start to become accustom to using survival triggers, fear and adrenalin, then your mind says "fuck this, I am out". It is a very dangerous and real threat that most people experience in some form during their working life. People with balance manage it. People who can't balance it, usually because of an expectation (sometimes perceived as real to you, but nobody else) or something like financial responsibility grind themselves into a mental mess and only seek assistance well after the fact.

A change in routine can also help. If you're the kind of person who stays up late most nights, change your routine for 4 weeks to go to bed after everything is done at night. I changed mine so that as soon as my kids went to bed, 7pm every night, I was in bed 30 mins later. Give your mind time to rest and recover.

Take up something light in the physical sense. Some of you work your asses off, but you do not tire your body. You are programmed to have that release. Tackle a local hill, if you're near the coast do a light jog on the sand etc.

Sometimes a sea change is for the better. Consider that you have a plan or a goal but if your work life is causing you so much anxiety and stress that it could literally shorten your lifespan then consider a change. For your sake.

Think of the good things you have accomplished, give yourselves a well earned pat on the back occasionally. We don't receive enough credit for the effort we make usually, also from a young age we aren't encouraged to self praise. This isn't healthy, you need to acknowledge your efforts, not be so critical on yourself if you've come up short occasionally.
I have plenty of times, missed timings, missed a grid reference, missed a fucking aeroplane to a deployment... Shit happens. At the time I was more critical of myself than my superiors were and they ended up removing me from my company because I was "...toxic ...and not in a compliant mindset for combat operations."

I don't know if this is an encouraging post or not. But if it helps one person in the slightest way then mission accomplished.